This was an email I sent to a good friend of mine earlier today. I thought others might get a kick out of my delimma so I'm sharing with my blog friends.

Hi!

I just wanted to share my frustrating experience with you because I know you can relate. I had to hire an assistant for our next event. It's the fall festival - this year is our 50th, so it's really big... in fact, it's normally the biggest event the chamber puts on through out the year. Anyway, the board really felt I needed an assistant - someone to answer phones and do basic computer stuff so that I could be out and about asking for sponsorships for the festival, etc.

So... me being the procrastinator that I am, was reluctant to put out a help wanted sign. I got a call from a lady that said that she heard from one of our board members I was hiring and could she come in for an interview. We got along really well on the phone so, you know what the heck, why not? We had scheduled for Monday morning at 9:00 a.m. Here's where I should have known better - she called at 8:39 to say she couldn't remember when the interview was because she wrote down Tuesday but was it really Monday? Yes, I should have said good bye but I just needed someone to do mundane office stuff while I was away. It's 4 hours a day at $8 an hour - I'm not going to get superwoman anyway. I rescheduled for Tuesday morning (I was in the middle of some computer work anyway so I didn't really care). She came in at 9 the next morning and we clicked well - she's very personable (great for the phones). I had already talked to my board president and said that honestly if we clicked as well in person as we did on the phone then I was going to hire her, which I did. She actually was ready to start, should she get the position, immediately. So I hired her and she started Tuesday. I showed her some basic things on the computer - nothing major (as least I didn't think so).

I have sponsors for my event. I put the sponsors names up on the front window of my office. I had a file that had already been started - Publisher with 17 pages already done. I decided since she was going to be in the office she could do the window sponsors - and they were mostly done anyway. The only thing she needed to do was change the page setup to legal landscape, stretch the border and the text box to reach the now longer width, and add an address/phone number for the sponsor. How hard could it be? Hahahaha! She worked on it for part of the day Wednesday. I actually left her alone for a couple hours on Thursday and by 2 p.m. Thursday afternoon not one was ready to be printed! That's right - not one! After she left, I went into the file and cleaned up everything and got all the borders and text boxes arranged properly so it won't even take that much time to finish them.

But, what was great was... when we were getting to know each other we talked about our kids, etc. The next day she couldn't even remember how many kids I have. And she came dragging in a couple minutes after 10 (hours are 10-2) with a pillow. She had "fallen" down her steps and had just come from the ER having an x-ray done - nothing broken but it sure feels like it. Whatever... she used the pillow to sit on and then moved like molasses the rest of the day when getting up and down. And she was shoving in tylenol and ibuprofen like it was lifesavers. Then she tells me I have to run and get my mobi (whatever the heck that is!) and I'll be back in 10 minutes or so. Excuse me? The only person who should be leaving is me - that's why we hired you. But I didn't say that... actually what I thought was, did she really just leave? Turns out it was ok because I got a call the minute she left from a friend... "Girl, I hate to gossip but I wish you would have called me before you hired her!" Uh oh! It's all good - she's a very nice person (confirmed by my phone friend) who may have a prescription drug problem (speculated by phone friend and myself before I ever got the call!) who happens to have some drama issues (no kidding!), but is very personable and will do great on the phones!. Thanks, friend - I wish I would have called you first too! Lol

Anyway, the next day (Thursday), I'm in the office early for an appointment - actually three before 10 a.m. So the phones decided to go crazy during my meetings and we don't have voice mail, we have an answering machine. So, I get two calls (or maybe three) between 9:57 and 10:08 a.m. They all have to go to the answering machine - which I can hear because it's the old fashioned kind. But I am determined to concentrate on fireworks guys that are here discussing firework set up for the festival, when I am surprised that the second caller is my new hire. I ignored the call and as soon as the guys left (10:15 ish) I go check the answering machine. "I know I'm late - I can't find my keys anywhere! I've been looking and as soon as I find them I'll be right there!" Frustration builds up... but whatever... it's only a month (8 weeks at the longest) and it's $8 frickin dollars an hour so what can I really expect?? Well being on time would be nice but maybe I'm setting my expectations too high! So then she comes in - "I'm so sorry I'm late, I couldn't find my keys and I'm still moving slow from the fall... etc." I'm like fine here's where we are right now... I'm going to leave for a couple of hours so you can work on the window sponsors without me needing the computer. I go to make several stops and realize I forgot one of the forms I need so I swing by the office to pick it up and she's on a personal call. I don't mind personal calls -if it's not interrupting work, I can multi-task but not sure she can. She hurries up and gets off the phone and "oh blah, blah, my cousin, blah..." not really sure because I tuned her out. I left again and stayed away for awhile. I get back a little after 2 and she's not done with any of her stuff. "I'm not a time clock cow - I'll just be another minute but I don't just look at the time clock and try to milk the time or anything." Lady, you came in nearly 20 minutes late - you can stay until 2:20 and get the work done. I know you're no time clock cow because I have to approve your time sheet before you get paid!

Anyway, now we're on Friday... I decided to have her do something else. Something that I didn't realize was brain surgery but apparently it was. We have a website for our chamber (www.vckschamber.com by the way) that I and another chamber member take care of. Anyway, we needed to update the member directory. I told her to make a list of the companies that were on the website... compare that list to my notebook with current members... if they are in the book but NOT on the computer then they need to be added. I gave her last year's list to get the information from if it wasn't listed in the notebook (basically just a reference book). I went over the instructions with her - she wrote them down - I asked if she had any questions (I spent over 20 minutes walking through the instructions and having her do the steps), then I gave her my cell number (again) and left.

Now, I'm a horrible person because I got finished early but dreaded going back to the office so I stopped at Wendy's and went inside to have lunch and read my library book for awhile. My mistake... I was there only about 1/2 hour and got at least two calls from her with questions about the web stuff. I went back to the office to see what I needed to help her with. OMG! she was totally doing it wrong. She had abandoned both the list and the notebook and was using last year's reference guide to enter ALL the companies into the computer. NO! Some of those people are NOT members this year and do not go on the site! How hard is it! - I gave you specific instructions, which you wrote down!! Ok, so I didn't actually say that but I wanted to and, after a few deep breaths, I asked her where her instructions were that she wrote down. I am not joking this is what she said, "What instructions?? I didn't write any down before you left. You just said make the list - I'm not even sure what the list is for - and to enter the companies in the site." I kid you not - those were her words!! I said, "No, you wrote down the instructions. Where is your paper from this morning?" "I don't know - I didn't have a paper this morning." OMG Again!!! Ok, deep breath. We need the list because we need to compare it to the notebook, we need to enter the companies that are members but not on the list into the computer. "So, what's the list for?" "Where's your paper from this morning???!!" I found her paper - folded in half and stuck with some other stuff. "See, here's your instructions from this morning." "No, that's just the steps I need to take to get into the website." I, unfolding the paper, point to the bottom and say right there! you have them listed #1 Make a list from the computer. #2 Compare to the notebook. #3 If in the notebook but not on the list add them to the computer. "Yes, but why do I need to make a list from the website? I have a members list that you already gave me (an excel program with our members on them for her reference if she gets calls for the members)." Seriously???!!

So, after she left I went through the list on the computer and cleaned up the ones that needed more information and were put in wrong. Then I deleted the two companies that weren't supposed to be on the computer at all. And I am so frustrated!!

The point was.. I hate having an assistant!! Lol. Yes, I know you are probably laughing and that's fine - I'm kind of chuckling too - at least until Monday morning! You know, this is kind of humorous.. I may just copy this straight to my blog later and let everyone get a kick out of it.

Ok so I was going to email this to you yesterday but had to stop to run errands and then never got back onto the computer. But you'll never guess how today went... Wonderful! Because she called in sick!! Yes, less than one full week and she called in sick! Yes, I hate having an assistant!

Summer updates

Ok, I know I've kept you hanging after such a shock on my last post. As far as that situation goes there is no update on the legal position. Update on Kodi... she's seeing a therapist once a week. We had a few rounds about her attending high school in a few weeks. She doesn't want to go to the high school. She wants to online school. I think that she is not wanting to go based on what she thinks will happen. She is under the unbelievable impression that everyone hates her and no one believes what she said - but they believe the boy. Some of her "friends" did turn on her but not as many as she thinks. She still has a lot of friends that stand behind her but she doesn't realize it yet. With the therapist's help, I've convinced her to give high school a try - a minimum of 6 weeks - before we switch to either an online school program or some other alternative. I just don't want her to miss out on high school... tennis, ball games, dances, etc. We put her on abilify several months ago because of her behavior. She's gotten better with the attitude but she's been really depressed so we had to put her on anti-depressants last week to help her cope. I try to find reasons for her to help me at work or stay close to her but she does have a few friends that she hangs with and spends the night with on occasion so that's good.

Deklan... He's driving me crazy! He's always looking for something to do - he's never happy with anything! He's bored; he's wants to go to the store; he wants something else to do/play with. Ugh! He goes to day camp for children with special needs two days a week but I don't know what to do with him the rest of the time. Oh, and he has this new thing... he can be screaming his head off for hours. Once I hit the breaking point and scream back and tell him how much trouble he's going to be in if he doesn't knock it off - he suddenly gets a memory lapse! That's right, suddenly it's (very calm voice) "what are you talking about? I did do what you wanted me to didn't I?" Are you freaking kidding me??!! No, you didn't do what I wanted you to do! This makes me want to laugh hysterically when he does this because he is so totally serious and innocent. Kodi on the other hand wants to throttle him. It's extremely annoying and kind of funny at the same time.

Hayleigh... who's that?? Just kidding - she's been gone nearly every night and day this summer. She has a couple of friends that she hangs with, goes to the pool with, spends the night with and we hardly ever see her. She comes home long enough to do a load of laundry every now and then and then disappears again. At least she's enjoying the summer.

Me... I just had my second big event for the chamber. We had a golf tournament today. It was freaking HOT - 104 degrees plus humidity. Thank God there was a breeze for most of the morning. It was a great tournament! I think everyone had a great time. We've already got next year's dates (June 29, 2012) set for our next tournament. Lol - it takes a year to plan a really great tournament (or at least get a really good course scheduled!). Dakota volunteered with me at the tourney. She did a really great job and I'm very proud of her. She and I both drove a golf cart for the first time ever. She drove the beverage cart - adults took turns on the cart with her - but she drove for most of the day and loved it. Everyone thought she was adorable. She also helped with set up and clean up without complaining.

That's our summer update so far.

Serious business

First, I have good news (if you call autism good - lol). Deklan's diagnosis stayed the same - he definitely has autism. I know that's a weird thing to be happy about but I really am. The psychologist that tested him said that since autism has been in the news more that she's had a lot of parents actually want their kids to be diagnosed with autism. So, she was being careful with our diagnosis. However, after the testing, talking with me, and getting the paperwork from the teachers - she said there is no doubt that Lil D is autistic. She also said that in the past two months she's tested about 10 kids and Lil D is the first one that truly has the diagnosis. On that note, he is regressing terribly! The school doesn't have any clue to what to do with him either. They have a struggle with him every day - especially when it comes to writing. He has melt downs that include throwing chairs, screaming, crying, hitting, head banging, and completely shutting down. He's not even completely potty trained either! At my whit's end and not sure what to do with him. I listened to him scream and cry for over an hour yesterday because he wanted Wendy's instead of McDonald's - which he decided after we were already in the drive thru line... and he didn't get his way either.

Second, Dakota graduated 8th grade last night!! Whoohoo! There were days I thought she might not make it but she did! Lol. She looked beautiful! I procrastinated taking her to get a dress so we were in a rush yesterday before the recognition. We made it to seven stores and back home in 2 1/2 hours! She had to have a zebra print dress... and shoes... and a bra...... Lol. It was worth it!

Third, Kodi had her "wax museum" at school. Each 8th grader was assigned a historical person that they had to learn a speech and then dress up as that person. They all had to do a speech and create some kind of back board about the person. Then you walk up and "press" her button so that she starts talking. It was pretty good. K was Rosalind Elsie Franklin, the woman who helped discover DNA.

Fourth, I had my first big event at work. It was awesome! We had a sanctioned BBQ, Chili, Dutch Oven contest and Car Show. I had just under 90 days to pull it all together and I did! Ok... I had a lot of help. The board members are wonderful and were extremely helpful - jumping in to help wherever I needed them. Then we got reviewed by the BBQ representatives - and did awesome! They were really impressed. Then I got my event review from the board members - and it was awesome! I know - awesome is a big and annoying word - but I don't know how else to describe it!! Now, we work on the golf tournament. :)

Fifth, not so good news. In fact, it's kind of disturbing and sad. My oldest daughter was date raped a couple of weeks ago. We're on a gag order by the detective so I cannot give details. However, it was a boy she knew and was friends with. He was over at the house - they were in the back yard, there was some consensual hugging and some kissing... when things started progressing, she said stop and he didn't. When we went to the police, she had to be video taped during interview and then they sent us to a forensics nurse at the hospital. There were lots of pictures and testing - she was a real trooper. We were there for nearly five hours between the police department and the hospital. Since we filed charges (and it did go to the DA), the boy has not been back to school. Kodi is dealing really well with this - it was hard the first few days with people calling her a liar and a bunch of drama, but all that's getting much easier to deal with. We've talked about it, she's done well, and she's strong so this will just be a bump that we all get over. Never forget but get over. The day after it happened she called me from school - she was so overwhelmed and needed to tell me. I'm just happy that we have a relationship in which she's comfortable and trusts me enough to share with me what happened and how she's feeling. I know some girls would never be able to tell their parents.

What the ??!!!

They want to change Deklan's diagnosis to PDD-NOS. They said that he's too high functioning to be autistic, but doesn't score high enough to be asperger's either. Ugh!! He had one set of tests today and goes back Tuesday for another two hours.

Deklan's surgery went great! He was such a good boy... he didn't even cry. He teared up briefly when he realized that he couldn't open his eye because they had it taped shut. Once I explained that it was only for the day and the doctor would let him open it the next morning then the tears went away and all was well again. He took a short nap when we got home and then he was ready to play. He doesn't understand that he still has to take it easy because he has stitches in his eye that could still pop and cause damage. He has to wear the eye shield for a week... we go back to the doctor on Friday. When they took the bandage off and did the tests he could see right away. It was so great - yes, I cried.
Before the surgery.
After the surgery.
Before the doctor's post-op appointment.

Our vacation was awesome! We had such a great time. Since then the kids have started school again - 3rd grade, 6th grade, and 8th grade. I'm still president of the Parent Brigade (PTO) at the Middle School, which means I still help with the concessions, meals for the teachers, etc. and run the monthly meetings. I also am still co-leader of K's GS troop. The leader moved to Texas because she had to follow her job or lose it so she skypes to the meetings and her husband (R) and I do all the leg work here. We're hosting a booth at the annual church bazaar this year so R and I are doing the majority of the work for that - the leader will not be able to come back for that. Fun! Fun! Fun! I also am yearbook editor and member of the PTA at Deklan's school. Basically, I get to go up to his school every so often and take pictures - then I get to choose which ones go into the yearbook. That is fun - I really enjoy doing that. Wish I could get a job just doing that... but that's not going to happen! HaHa! I have also had knee surgery. Not doing as well as I had hoped or expected. It's been eight weeks and I'm still having trouble. I'm still on the board (treasurer) for the American Youth Soccer Organization in our region. I also am a member of the Friends of the Library for our local library. We're trying to raise enough money to build a new library which we desperately need. I spent nearly a whole week working a book sale for them... I figured the hours and it was nearly 40 hours! How funny is that - volunteering is almost a full time job. This will be my last year for Parent Brigade and AYSO though. I'm hoping to get a job soon. I'm torn though... I really enjoy being the "go to" mom that doesn't have to work and I enjoy taking all the vacation times the kids do. I know that once I get a job that stuff will not come so easily - even with a part time job.

Deklan is having eye surgery tomorrow. He's having a lens implant - right eye tomorrow... left eye in several weeks. Normally we would not be considering lens implants at this point. Hayleigh was ten before we even discussed hers - D's only eight. However, he has other eye issues that we're hoping will be corrected with the implants. Besides having poor vision (hence the implants), he also has eye crossing and difficulty focusing. This will be his fourth eye surgery but I'm still nervous. He seems to be dealing with it very well. He's been letting me put his eye drops in without any fussing. He knows that this surgery will help his eyes "be like Hayleigh's" as he puts it.

Halloween was fun this year. We didn't do a lot of regular trick or treating - we mostly went to the activities that the local churches had going on. The kids and I really enjoyed ourselves.


The girls have been playing soccer with AYSO. They were able to be on the same team this year. Thank goodness. Actually, R and I share the girls - ha! that sounds funny but he and I have a lot to do with each other and his girls are the same age/grade as my girls. We were able to put all four girls on the same team this time and that way we could see all their games. Otherwise we were going to have to switch up every other week - I take the older girls, he takes the younger and then switch for the next week. They haven't won a game yet but they are much better than last year. Anyway, R and I are always together for one thing or another and he treats my kids like his and I treat his like mine. In fact, K calls him her dad and his girls always call me mommy too. And since his wife is in Texas and my husband works nights we get along great.
Kodi and MaKenna
Hayleigh with the ball.
Kodi and Bayli

K also played tennis at school. She earned third place in doubles. I'm so proud of her. H wanted to do track but sixth graders aren't allowed to participate in school sports. She can't wait for next year though.


I can't wait for Thanksgiving... the kids and I are going to Mom's.

July

Ok so it's been awhile. I know... funny how life keeps getting in the way of my blogging. Anyway, here's what's been up this summer....

Deklan started day camp at Rainbows (a special needs camp) in June. He really liked it at first. Then he started throwing tantrums and saying he didn't want to go. However I'm such a mean mom, and we were getting a grant for him to attend, that I made him go anyway. And everyday when I picked him up he'd had a great day, lots of fun, field trips, etc. There were only a couple of days that he really screamed when I left but was completely fine when I picked him up. But it has been a struggle most days just to get him there. I really don't understand because he has such fun when he's there. He says it's because he doesn't get to spend any time with me.

Dakota spent a week at the end of June/first of July with my sister in law in Colorado. SIL's father retired so she went to his retirement party. Of course Hayleigh declined going on the trip because she already had plans with friends. My SIL made sure that she regretted that choice by buying Dakota dozens of new clothes and accessories. She got Hayleigh ONE shirt and Deklan ONE toy semi truck. Deep breath... we all know K is the favorite. Anyway, when Kodi got back from her "being the only child" trip she had a HUGE attitude problem.

July 4th was spent at my brother's of course. Just like every year; only this time we waited until later in the day to go over. Mainly because it rained all day. I was kind of hoping they would just cancel it, but it's such a big to-do in their neighborhood. All the neighbors and their friends/families come over and have a get together - food, beer, fireworks. It was ok - always is but I don't like my brother's attitude sometimes. He can be very mean and say hurtful things... of course he thinks he's joking so if I get mad then I'm the one blowing it out proportion so I don't normally say anything and just try to shrug it off. He wanted to take the "kids" to a movie the next day - K had free movie tickets from her birthday but only three. Brother dear was like so what? I have to pay for myself? He was taking them to the new Twilight movie (Eclipse?) and I knew that wasn't a movie for Deklan anyway. So basically what he meant is he wanted to take the girls to a movie. Little D was left ouit again. And after not seeing K for over a week, she and H both spent the night at Uncle's house. I was a little irritated. I told them that was fine I would take D to a movie after he got out of day camp. We went and saw Dspicable Me in 3D. It was kind of cute - first 3D movie for me ever. Deklan enjoyed our time together.

On July 7 all the kids started summer school. D chose to take an art class. Both of the girls had to take a math class because they did not do well on their grades. So now my schedule went from taking D to camp at 8:30 and picking up at 4:30 with errands, etc in between to... taking D to school at 9:00, picking up at 10:00, taking to camp at 10:30, picking up at 4:30, with all the errands in between. It sounds busy but really it's mostly driving. We finally got my car into the shop so the a/c works now (Thank God!) so it's not so bad... just the price of gas is ridiculous.

Only July 15 we took our Girl Scout troop on a trip to Texas. We went to Six Flags and Hurricane Harbor. It was fun. There were three adults, seven 13-year olds, two 11-year olds, and Deklan (7). Let me tell you if you are not used to 13-year old girls there is a LOT of DRAMA!! Everything causes someone to get their feelings hurt. But the important thing is that we survived.

We've also... been the dentist with the kids - H had to have a filling and about threw the biggest tantrum of any eleven year old you've ever seen. I thought I was going to knock her out. Chuck and I have both been to the doctor's (first in June then again in July)... He had very high cholesterol, triglycerides, and blood pressure so he's on several new meds. He had his check up and blood work showed a huge improvement already. I couldn't get my blood work rechecked yet because I haven't been on the thyroid med long enough yet. I have another month to go for that. I had my annual eye appointment and then had to go see a specialist because my pressure was too high. Glaucoma runs in the family (mom is completely blind in one eye and can barely see out the other) so I take the pressure thing very seriously. Good news was pressure was great when we rechecked it and the full eye exam showed that I have healthy eyes. We took the dogs to the vet for shots. Riley had ring worm and was put on meds for that. She's doing much better. She's a tough patient for the vet though. It took three nurses to hold her down for the ring worm test (they had to remove some hair for a fungal test which happened to be right at her eye). She was not a happy camper. Gage has chiggar bites and is sensitive to the grass so his tummy is pink from irritation. Otherwise all is well with them. All the kids have had a virus which included throwing up and other things. Of course not at the same time so that was fun waiting to see who would be next in line. All are much better now and it only lasted about 24 hours each. We went with H's GS troop to see the new Ramona and Beezus movie. It was much better than I thought it would be. I applied for another job which I did not get. My friend got the job instead so I guess I'm happy for her. And next on the list....

Friday is Mall Madness with the Girl Scouts. Mall Madness is Girl Scouts spend the night in the mall. Stores stay open late, some have sales, Radio Disney comes out and has entertainment for the girls. It's fun and tiring all at once. The girls always enjoy it though. D cannot go to this one so he's staying at the neighbors over night. I asked my brother to watch D but he said that his wife would be out of town and he just didn't think he could handle it by himself, especially if D had an accident in his pants. He would only be there for the night... literally, 8 p.m. to 6 a.m. Whatever. But I am excited for Mall Madness this year. I think it's because we're leaving for an actual vacation the next day. We've taken family trips see relatives but this will be our first real family vacation since D was almost one. We're going to Nickelodeon Universe - one of the largest indoor amusement parks - located inside Mall of America in Minnesota. I'm really excited for this trip. I really love being with my family... the kids are such great entertainment and I really do love that they still like to be with me - even at age 13. :)